BEST OF THE QUOTEBOOK ONLINE

These are my very favorite quotes of **all time**! They are quotes chosen from all of my quotebooks. I hope you like them as much as I do.
–Karin.

>> Dr. Sommers: "Now we're going to read 'Story of the Bad Little Boy.' Jim, will you start?"
Jimmy Lovestrand: "Once there was a bad little boy whose name was Jim--"
(Dr. Sommers: "I'm sorry! I really didn't plan that! I promise.")

>> "Don't tell me 'Dave, you're one in a million!' because that means there's a thousand people in China just like me." -Dave Griffieth

>> Sra. Lee: “Do you wanna know how it all got started? Well, first my mom and dad fell in love….”
Ryan Gebler: “And then after many tequilas…”
Karin: “Did you hear what he said?”
Ryan Gebler: “Tortillas. I said tortillas.”

>> Dr. Martin: "That's called partner security because if you marry someone really really ugly you know no one else will want them."
Dr. Clatterbuck: "That's what HIS wife did."

>> (Rebecca asks Annie if she used a diffuser to curl her hair, then explains to Jon what a diffuser is.)
"I love how they name hair care products after science fiction weapons."
-Jon Henderson

>> “I'm slow. God made me that way. You condemn me, you condemn the Father." –Burns

>> "Do you know how long gum stays in your stomach? Seven years! That's like the shelf-life of a twinkie!" -Jon Luecke

>> "My dad's Norwegian and my mom's adopted, so I'm pretty much half Norwegian and half girl." -Shaun Thompson

>> "If I had a nickel for every note I took in that class, I'd be able to buy a gumball." -Kristy Goskesen

>> Karin: "I bet we'll get lunch on the plane."
Burns (Jon Foster): "Yah, it's not so bad...get the Kosher meal."
Karin: "There's a kosher meal?"
Burns: "Yeah! Jews fly too!"

>> (on our way to the Mardi Gras parade)
Chad Wahlberg:"People wear the beads because they give them to you and then you flash them."
Anna Klotz: "I'm not flashing anyone!"
Chad: "Then why are we even here?"

>> We're about to take a Harvey Martin exam.
Karin: "What good is a pencil when you don't have an eraser?"
Andrea Junkert: "What good is a pencil when you don't have an answer?"

>> "A hedgehog is about the worst pet you can have. You have to wear gloves to play with it. It's like one big needle...with legs." -Bradley Reeser

>> "Consider the following falacious argument:
*God is love.
*Love is blind.
*Ray Charles is blind.
*Therefore Ray Charles is God.
There is obviously something wrong here." -Dr. Paul Helseth

>> Randy: "What are other terms used for "sex."
someone: "making love."
"Making love. We're going to stop right there because that's what I was
looking for." -Randy Ertman

>> (on being rich vs. having friends and what is happiness)
"What I learned today is that if we all can be friends and they see that
we're friends then we all can be friends...until I'm poor and they all
desert me." -Adam Koene

>> (an alarm rings in the room.)
Peter Kvamme: "Fire!"
Karin: "That's what I think of when I hear an alarm that I didn't set myself."
Peter: "You think of me saying 'fire'?"

>> (everyone is commenting on how nice the McDonald's cashier is)
Anna Klotz: "I should fill out a comment card."
Burns: "I should marry her."

>> “If everyone had the same first and last name would it be hard to have an election? Why or why not?” –Ryan Ellefson

>> Brent Deim: “Last night when everyone was off the bus I came back on and someone’s CD player was on and playing and I turned it off.”
Chad Wahlberg: “It was probably secular music and Satan was listening to it.”

>> We’re in Revelation class and Jimmy falls asleep. Dan walks him up at the end of class and Jimmy has lines all over his forehead.
Dan Miner: “You’ve been sealed! You’ve got the mark of the beast!”
Jimmy Barton: “At least I can buy stuff.”

>> Vanessa Zinthefer: “And they put him in jail overnight.”
Mr. Schrank: “They don’t put a 4th grader in jail overnight.”
Vanessa: “The detention…the kiddy jail.”
Carol Schumacher: “The one with the colored bars and animals on the walls.”

>> “Things are growing gay, growing gay, (he slaps himself) GOING GREAT!” –Dr. Daryl Aaron

>> “I’m not just kind of out of it…I couldn’t get back into it if I had a pass…”
-Kristy Goskesen

>> (Kenny is telling us about his new group of friends at UPS. He meant to say that they are a close group and very “tight knit.”)
“Yeah, we’re a real tit night group.” –Kenny Bristol

>> “This was not just a matter of circumcision…that was just a slice of it.”
–Dr. Daryl Aaron